Have you ever answered the question of what makes you marriage material? How about what are your true intentions for being married? Truth is, many of us unmarried people desire marriage, but when we’re asked why we want it, our answers may not be solid or confident. We just “want to,” or because “it’s the next step in my life.” This is the season to determine your why for the things you want out of life.
That’s why my blogger sis Kristin Kimble‘s debut book is the December book of the month! Would I Marry Me? Is a 7 day devotional for women of God to ask some important questions about our perspectives on marriage and being a wife. Learn more about Kristin in this Q&A below:
BLISS: What inspired you to write a book like this at this time in your life?
KK: Now, being into my 30s, I’ve recognized that self-evaluation is key. I find myself saying, “I’m too be old to still be doing this, or acting this way, or thinking this way, I need to do and be better.” So as a single woman who desires to be married, having been in about four relationships where three out of the four men broke up with me for the exact same reason, I realized I needed to do some serious self-evaluation, which actually led me to go to counseling for the first time.
“I’m not sure people really take the time to analyze their life; truly analyze why things didn’t work out or why that relationship failed.”
We don’t like to take accountability for our own actions and own struggles. We gloss over them and attempt to enter into another relationship the same way. They insanity is doing the same thing and expecting a different result, well, I was plum crazy! This book is a way to challenge single women who desire to be married to do a self-evaluation on their personal life and character, but also on their thoughts toward marriage.
“Many grow up thinking that marriage is the obvious next step once you get older and pass a certain mark in life. They don’t really understand the true covenant it is with God, and the necessity to seek God’s direction on a marriage partner and even if marriage is on God’s agenda for your life.”
BLISS: What is your main message for women to receive as they read your book?
KK: My main message for women in my book is to prepare to be a woman you’d marry and not to simply be someone else’s wife.
“It’s imperative that we not prepare to be someone’s wife, but simply prepare to be the woman God created you to be. If God called you to be a wife, then you already are, it’s simply about being the best you can be for God. And leave it to God to bring you to the husband He has for you in His perfect time.”
BLISS: Which of the lessons in your book was the hardest for you to learn in your single season?
KK: The hardest lesson I had to learn was DIY vs DIWG: Doing it yourself versus Doing it with God. Another thing about getting older is your impatience begins to grow if you don’t get a handle on it. I had to learn to truly rest in God and fully trust Him. Not that cute, “I trust you Lord,” but that “God I fully surrender to you and your will be done not mine,” type of trust.That honestly takes time, and I believe you have to go through some things for God to truly get the faith and trust out of you that He desires. Click To Tweet
“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.” James 1:2-3
BLISS: When does a single know that they are ready for marriage?
KK: I believe a person will know they are ready for marriage when they have spent a significant amount time with the one who created it, God. When they can say how God speaks to them and what He has said concerning marriage in their life because they have prayed and asked Him, and actually sat to wait for an answer. And when they do get an answer, they find so much contentment in God, that if it doesn’t happen, they are okay because they are seeking more after God, and not a ring and a status.
BLISS: How have you learned to be content in your single season even if you feel as though you’re ready for marriage?
KK: I can honestly say that I am in a good place in my life right now. I am content. I learned that finding your purpose and walking in it head first absolutely helps to keep me focused on the bigger picture of the kingdom. Marriage is not the pinnacle of my life, choosing Christ was. So I’m enjoying that journey of getting to know my Father and everything He has called me to do for His kingdom. I believe in due season, He will bring alongside my husband, that we may both continue to do God’s will and advance His kingdom together.