By Tatianah Green
It’s that time of year again to gather with family and celebrate what you are thankful for and of course partake in some delicious dishes.
If you are single as in not dating, or it’s too early to bring a new prospect around to meet family, you may very well get asked about your relationship status or love life:
“When are you getting married?”
“When are you gonna give me some grandbabies?!” (My mom’s personal favorite)
“What happened to that girl/guy you was seeing?”
“I know someone at___ that you should meet…”
“You ever thought about getting back with (____)? Y’all were cute together.”
These are just some of perhaps many annoying questions that singles will get this week and well into the New Year. Here are a few options to either respond or do Thanksgiving on your own terms because you can.
#ThanksgivingClapback! Y’all, I love Twitter’s ease of use and that you can access so much content at one time. This hashtag has trended over the past 24 hours and folks are really creative over these memes. While you may be very tempted to talk back, give a sarcastic comment, throw shade or whatever else you want to call it, be sure to hold your tongue.
“The mouth of the righteous is the fountain of life…” Proverbs 10:11
“When words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise.” Proverbs 10:19
The clapback hashtag is for entertainment, so please don’t try this at your home. Holidays like Thanksgiving that bring the family together tend to be either peaceful or contentious, but I encourage you to keep your cool and protect your peace. Whether you’ve just got out of a relationship or been single for some time, everyone can ask and speculate about your love life, but don’t let them steal your joy.
#Friendsgiving is always an option. One of the many benefits of being single is that you can leave the family gathering whenever you want to. You can also create and practice new traditions like friendsgiving, which is a potluck gathering of friends at someone’s house. It’s popular among people without family in their town or who want to gather with like minded folks. You can host a friendsgiving get together this weekend where everyone brings a new dish or enough leftovers of a side to share, enjoy some fellowship and catch up on life. There are plenty of new movies out this weekend as well so you can meet up with your crew after the dinner is over or during the weekend.
#BeThankful. Responding in gratefulness and faith is a good way to deflate any borderline offensive attempts to kill your vibe at Thanksgiving dinner. If a loved one asked why you are still single or when you’re getting married, you can respond with something like “I may be single, but I’m thankful that I have my right mind, that I have peace, that I have time to ____, accomplish ____, grow in ____ characteristic, etc.”
You can share that you’re thankful to be single because you’re finally allowing God to work on you and develop you into the wife or husband that you desire to be. Although we don’t necessarily like the wait at times, especially on family-centered holidays, you’ll be grateful that you’re maturing in the Lord and when the time comes for a boo/spouse you will be better able to handle the next onset of questions with maturity and patience: marriage and/or kids!
Yes, it doesn’t stop. Even if you’re single and have a child/children already, you may have relatives who will ask if you will have more once you’re in a committed relationship or on the way to marriage. The questions will always come, so why get frustrated and lose your peace? Don’t take their prodding and poking so seriously and keep your responses focused on the Lord. Heather Lindsey shared some great advice in this area:
May you have a blessed Thanksgiving holiday and weekend! Feel free to share your #ThanksgivingWhileSingle stories with us on Twitter @BLISS_BCS!
"I’ve learned by now to be quite content whatever my circumstances. I’m just as happy with little as with much, with much as with little. I’ve found the recipe for being happy whether full or hungry, hands full or hands empty. Whatever I have, wherever I am, I can make it through anything in the One who makes me who I am." -Philippians 4 MSG